Yeah, it’s true. When we’re faced with truly obnoxious clients we vets do what all professionals do but almost never deign to admit: We sometimes pad the bill (well, sort of).

I’m surely immersing myself in scalding water on this one but honesty’s what you come to Dolittler for, right? So soak it up, because this post’s going to tell you why sugar beats vinegar every time.

Today’s client...

What the heck gives with the all-too-common mouthing-off when a surprisingly fit dog enters the puppy park. “Would you just look at that?! You think she’d feed him occasionally!”

No, this dog’s skin isn’t plastered to his ribs, nor is there any other evidence of illness or ill treatment. This is a dog as he’s meant to be: healthy and lean.

As this four year-old makes his way around the canine...

I know I’ve hit this hot button before. But it never fails to relieve my stress to tell tales of waiting game frustrations in vet medicine—on both sides of the sitting-in-the-waiting-room-waiting-impatiently-to-be-seen dilemma.

Last week’s notable case was a new client. He came in 15 minutes late. He had already been bypassed by an early emergency. Then he was bypassed by a euthanasia (they...

Don’t get me wrong—I love beagles. I grew up with one named “Chicho” who lived at the nearby home of my three spinster aunts. He was typical of his breed in his even-temperedness, his famous wanderlust and his vocal range: Baruuu! Baruuuuuu!

Mouth-wateringly cute as pups, easy-to-please as adults (show ‘em anything edible), it makes sense that Americans consider them their number one breed. And...

It’s true. Sometimes we vets want to hide when breeders come our way. Altogether too often they infuriate and intimidate us with a reputation for stressful demands and know-it-all ways . I know this because my vet friends bemoan their patronage while grumbling posts on the Veterinary Information Network (the vet-industry-only online watering hole) confirm the seemingly universal sentiment.

In...

Sophie is my ten year-old French Bulldog. She’s been at the specialty hospital for the past 24 hours and the worst is over. But I’ve been a nervous wreck—as any of you might be if faced with a similar crisis.

Sophie’s neck pain has been dogging her for six weeks now. She’s had anti-inflammatory drugs, opiate pain relievers, muscle relaxants, nutraceuticals, Reiki, massage, exercise restriction...

How many times can I say it. I’m truly not trying to steal your money. It’s just that there’s no way I can tell you what’s wrong with your pet unless we probe a little more deeply. X-rays, bloodwork, urinalyses, ultrasound, CT scans and MRIs are but a few of the items on the menu. The one thing I can’t offer you? A tricorder eval.

Remember that device “Bones” used to determine what the heck was...

A quick Google search in vet news turned up at least three US vet hospital fires in the last month. Another guy a couple of months ago got extra press for his heroics in getting everyone out safely--but his whole place burnt down.

Now that’s a bad day. While he received accolades for managing to get everyone out safely, I’m sure his life has been a living hell since the TV vans packed up and...

Nothing hits vets where it really hurts than when news breaks in the hospital of a records request. So-and-so client is defecting to another local practice without leaving word or explaining why. They just want out—usually because they’re unhappy with you for a real or perceived injury to them or their pet.

It happens every other month or so and I guess that’s not too bad compared to the...

What makes anyone think that a mouth that smells like three-day-old garbage (and frequently far worse) isn’t worthy of treatment? Teeth just get no respect! To get anyone to sit up and pay attention we vets have to start talking about hearts, livers and kidneys—more respectable (albeit, unseen) organs.

Why is it that abscessed teeth get paid no heed unless an animal’s face swells like a...